There’s a 50% chance you’re reading this in the morning so I went with it. There’s also a 50% chance it’s currently the evening, but sure look, we both can’t be right. Although, there’s a 10% chance you’re dossing off during your working day and scrolling through our website.
“That’s 110%,” you say. Well, that’s because we don’t believe in 100%, we only give 110. But, well done on your adding up skills, you’re a credit to your maths teacher and I can see why your employer keeps you around.
How did we get on at our awards ceremony? How did we get on at our awards ceremony indeed.
Suited, booted, and in a convertible Porsche, we should’ve known it was not going to go our way when that first drop of rain hit the immaculately waxed metallic black paintwork. Speaking of booted, I need to mention one of the awards presenters on the night who was quite literally suited and booted… with Timberlands. Although I admired the braveness of the man, it probably won’t be a trend I’ll be getting involved in. Lel.
Live-streamed to the world, these locally global awards were the first of their kind post-pandemic. (Post-pandemic is a bit strong given the current numbers - we watch the news and see what’s going on, but it’s not our place to say people are idiots and need to cop on. But again, not our place). Anyway, back to the story…
Held in Glór, Clare’s equivalent to a Vegas arena, the canapés were enjoyed and the prosecco was flowing. Not for us though – empty carbs, the body is a temple, you get the picture. After a while, we were ushered in through the main theatre doors and taken to our seats. One of the seats had the number three in it. A sign, or so we thought. Look, you’re going to need to keep pace with the story or leave - the word ‘car’ has three letters, our seat had a three in it, and thus, it was a sign.
The awards were being thrown out thick and fast. Now, I don’t usually throw out the word ‘fixed’, but that is exactly what I said when I managed to repair the rear lights on an MGB yesterday.
The screen behind the MC changed as he read out the title of the next category… “Ladies and Gentleman, we now have the award for the best use of digital marketing and social media”. A hush descended slowly upon the audience until it was deathly silent. You could hear a pin drop. I know this because my Lyons Garages pin suddenly dropped from the lapel of my petrol blue tailored suit and everybody turned to look. I know what you’re thinking… “Petrol blue, they really do think of everything”.
Aided by the first McDonald’s/carb that’s entered this absolute specimen of an athlete’s body, I’ve just about gotten to terms with the UTTER DEVASTATION of not taking home that piece of crystal. But, we move on and we’ll make sure that we slip in the extra fiver to next year’s organisers.
That’s the update for now, I’ll be back at the end of the week to let you know about our Christmas Hamper and to also bombard you with coffee this, coffee that, and buy our new coffee range. I won't say no to a sympathy purchase of coffee.
I’ll probably tell you what’s been happening in the garage of late as well if you’re good.
Oh and don’t worry about me, I’m doing absolutely fine! Award-nominated still sounds great you know? Just because there's no bit of glass on the mantle piece doesn't take away from the fact that I'm a star in the eyes of my Mam. I won’t let it affect me, strong-minded I am.
Ok! best be off, dinner’s here – Chinese.